After an intensive session on relationships and marriage that day, the young lady stood up to ask; “Sir, is there anything like a pressure-free marriage?” Obviously, the discussion we had that day on marriage painted a biblical reality about marriage that seemed different from what most people face.
Friend, God wants you to have a pressure-free marriage (Genesis 2:18, Proverbs 5:8). The truth is, God created marriage to be enjoyed, and not just to be endured. He wants you to live in His pleasure and not under life’s pressure (Psalms 16:11). But for the fall, every marriage is supposed to be like the garden of Eden, where there is purpose, pleasure, and prosperity (Genesis 2:8, 3:24).
Pressure-free marriage is not the same as problem-free marriage. While the latter admits the obvious and peculiar challenges that every marriage faces, the former speaks to the place of divine wisdom that we can engage to help deal with whatever comes up in our marriage (Proverbs 4:7).
Pressure-free marriage is a function of the right understanding and perspective (Proverbs 23:7). The way you see life and marriage will ultimately impact your response to the same. If you see marriage as a place to fight or make protests regarding just about anything, or if you see your partner as your enemy or competitor, you cannot have a pressure-free marriage (Malachi 2:14, 1 Peter 3:7).
A lot of people enter marriage with low or no preparation, little wonder they bulge in the face of challenges (Proverbs 24:10). Really, it is not the pressure on the outside that crushes you but the emptiness on the inside (2 Corinthians 4:7-9). You cannot perform better in marriage than the preparation you took into it.
Pressure-free marriage is a function of focus and contentment. Contentment is not the same as complacency. It is simply enjoying where you are on the road to where you are going (Hebrews 13:5-6). Comparison is a thief of time and peace. No two marriages are the same. When you understand the season of your marriage, you will refuse the temptation to compare your marriage with another (2 Corinthians 10:12). God wants you to have a pressure-free marriage.
‘Demola Awoyele
Lead Pastor,
Destiny Impact Church
Akure, Nigeria