I was counselling a young man in my office the other day. As we discussed relationships and marriage, I asked if he’d ever thought of a particular lady I saw connecting well with him. His response got me thinking: “But sir, we’re friends. I don’t think I can marry her.” I replied, “Do you want to marry your enemy?”
Friend, you need to understand friendship in marriage. Friendship is the bond that holds thriving marriages together (Proverbs 18:24). You can’t enjoy your marriage more than the level of friendship you’ve developed with your spouse (Malachi 2:14).
When you do marriage with someone you connect with easily, marriage becomes fun, not work (Proverbs 5:18). It becomes pleasure, not pressure. A blessing, not a burden. Singing worship songs and praying together is great, but if there’s no friendship, something is missing.
Ladies, if you want to marry a passionate brother, don’t undermine friendship. If you find a brother or sister who loves God and connects with you, you’ve found someone to do life and destiny with (Proverbs 5:15-20). The lack of chemistry in relationships often causes problems (Amos 3:3).
Marry your friend or befriend who you marry. Some marry friends; others choose to befriend their spouse. Friendship often develops over time (Proverbs 18:24). That’s why courtship is crucial – bond as friends.
Don’t just focus on spiritual things; build friendship. Crack jokes, tease each other, and genuinely care. Don’t spend too much time with someone who’s not your spouse (Genesis 3:1-6). You’ll be close to whoever you spend time with. Sow quality time in your relationship and reap a strong marriage (Genesis 8:22). Marry your friend.
‘Demola Awoyele
Lead Pastor,
Destiny Impact Church
Akure, Nigeria
