In the early days of our courtship, myself and my wife (then, fiancée) went out on a date. We needed to really talk. Before then, there was this fear that our relationship must not break; we were models on campus. But this was not allowing us to be free.

So, I told my wife, “Please, you are free to walk away from this relationship if you think you need to. You are not bound.” After that, everything changed for the better. We now knew that we were in it for God and us, not necessarily what people would say.

Friend, true love frees. Any supposed love that keeps you in bondage is not love. Perfect love casts out fear (1 John 4:18)! Why are you afraid to express yourself in that relationship? Why do you continue to bottle up stuff because you don’t want to offend him or her? The right kind of love is expressive. You are free to be you.

You are supposed to be in a relationship, not a prison! A young lady started attending our church a few years ago. After enjoying the atmosphere and the flow for a while, she said to me, “Pastor, I love how you administer your leadership here. You are not overly possessive, unlike the few churches I know. You pastor us and allow us to be us.”

The truth is, nobody wants to be caged. Nobody wants to have anyone lord it over him. Nobody wants a fiancĂ©, spouse, pastor, etc. who puts them in bondage. There is the glorious liberty of the children of God (Romans 8:21). That’s the beauty of Christianity. God allows us to be free. He would not force His will on us. He only works in us both to will and do of His good pleasure (Philippians 2:13).

Be careful of relationships; marital, church, friendship, etc., that do not allow you to be free and expressive. Until you are free to make mistakes, free to be stupid, free to be you, you are not yet in the right relationship or doing the relationship rightly. You need to clarify your relationships this season. You are either engaged or entangled.

While God engages us in the right relationships for the fulfilment of destiny, the devil seeks to entangle us to demobilize us in destiny. Don’t be blindly in love. Let the truth of God’s word set you free as you embrace His concept of love and relationship this season (John 8:32, Philippians 1:9-11). You will succeed!

‘Demola Awoyele
Lead Pastor,
Destiny Impact Church
Akure, Nigeria