The other day, I stumbled upon a video online where a preacher advised singles not to stress themselves about getting to know God’s will for them in marriage. In his words, “Just check around and look for who you like. If you both are fine with each other, just go ahead and marry.” I almost doubted if I was listening to a minister of the gospel.
Friend, don’t just marry who you like. Marriage is too long a journey to make your choice based on who or what you like (Malachi 2:14-16). Unless you are not planning to marry one person for the rest of your life, marrying who you like is a recipe for marital failure (Proverbs 14:12).
Like your emotions, what you like is flaky and changes with time (1 Corinthians 13:11). Have you noticed that what you were so crazy about five years ago no longer tickles your fancy? Your taste will change. Your season will change. Therefore, you cannot marry based on what changes (Hebrews 13:8).
Marry for something eternal, not something temporal (2 Corinthians 5:7). Marry for the future, not just the present. Choose God’s divine choice, not human likeliness or weakness. Sometimes, what you like reflects your weakness. There’s a difference between love and lust (2 Samuel 13:1-15).
If the foundation is wrong, what can the righteous do (Psalm 11:3)? Dear young man, get your foundation right. Know God. Know His will and purpose for your life. Grow in the things of God. Belong to a local church. Be accountable to the right people and places (1 Timothy 4:12-15).
If you marry based on what you like, what happens when that thing is no longer there (1 Corinthians 13:7-8)? If it’s God who brought you together, that presence, conviction, and purpose will keep you together, no matter the changing season and circumstances (2 Timothy 1:12). Don’t just marry who you like.
‘Demola Awoyele
Lead Pastor,
Destiny Impact Church
Akure, Nigeria