I picked some vital lessons from my dad as I grew up as a young man. These lessons are helping me greatly today. It was from my dad I learnt how to be a strong man. He epitomized strength that is seen in care, responsibility and sound leadership. From him, I learnt what makes a man.

Friend, what makes a man is not muscle but strength. You can have muscle and lack strength. Muscle is external, strength is internal. Muscle is of the body, strength is of the heart (Isaiah 35:4). What God is looking for in His leaders is not first brilliance but strength (Joshua 1:6-7, 9). A brilliant but weak man is a headache to Heaven; God cannot do much with him.

“You therefore, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus” (2 Timothy 2:1). We are commanded to be strong. It means we have what it takes to be strong, we just need to take responsibility and develop capacity. God does not normally emphasize our weakness, He always speaks to our strength (Judges 6:12, Joel 3:10). It takes strength to forge ahead in life. It takes strength to make progress in spite of challenges and oppositions. It takes strength to fulfil destiny.

It takes strength to lead a home. It takes strength to lead a woman (1 Corinthians 9:5). It is not first a function of age or status but a function of your spiritual and mental stature as a man. This strength is not by shouting or always announcing your leadership; it is by truly leading. An average woman wants to be led; it is lack of leadership that makes most women go wayward (Genesis 3:1-9).

“For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him…” (Genesis 18:19). If you are not ready to lead a home, don’t marry. If you are not ready to take responsibility for the outcomes in your home, you had better not marry. When the first family had a problem, God did not ask about the woman but about the man (Genesis 3:9). Family crises sometimes speaks to the absence of the man in correct leadership.

Men must learn to use strength correctly. There are times that strength is seen in apologizing. Actually, it takes more strength to say sorry (even you when you think you are right) than it takes to vent your anger. It takes strength to serve your wife and family. A weak man bosses the wife. A weak man beats the wife. A weak man shies away from responsibility. Strong men exercise authority by leading lovingly.

© ‘Demola Awoyele
Lead Pastor,
Destiny Impact Church
Akure, Nigeria